April was good to us

The day after we returned home from Florida, Houston had his final Memory Master proof with Mrs. Scholtz, our CC Foundations director. His third proof went swimmingly well with Mrs. Bach, but then again, that was before vacation.

Houston proudly displays his Memory Master awards. We’re so proud of you!

After a week off, I knew I was a little rusty. But thankfully, Houston’s brain isn’t old and crusty as mine, and he tackled this last step toward mastery with a calm, cool confidence. Way to go, dude!

So, here’s what a Cycle 1 Memory Master knows:

  • The entire timeline of 160 events from Creation to modern times;
  • 24 history sentences, mostly ancient times;
  • 24 science questions and answers about biology and earth science;
  • Multiplication tables through the 15s, and the squares and cubes, as well as conversions and math laws;
  • Continents, countries, cities, mountains, bodies of water, and physical features from around the world pertaining to the ancient world;
  • 24 definitions and lists of English grammar;
  • Latin noun cases and declensions;
  • and the 44 U.S. presidents.

Here’s Houston sliding into second base during the Tigers vs. Nationals game. Safe!

Even though Houston was the star student, I really think Gabe and Zeke could have pulled it off with just a little more consistent review. Maybe next year, fellas!

Tigers baseball

Houston is also playing competitive baseball this spring. No more Y ball because we figured it was high time for score keeping, three strikes your out, winner takes all, etc.

As of now, his team, the Tigers, has only lost one game. All the kids played their hearts out, so it was a great experience on how to lose with pride. And it was Nick2’s team who beat them, so it was also a lesson in winning with grace, which Nick did aplomb.

We celebrated the all-around good sportsmanship at Rio Grande taco night with Nick, and his folks, Shannon and Sam. We feasted, talked about sports, faith, and health, and enjoyed a few margaritas to boot. Good times.

With Tyrnan gaining on him, Gabriel focuses hard during the egg race @ CC field day.

Daddy says Houston’s fielding has improved drastically from previous seasons. Now if he could just get his hitting form in line, Daddy explained, he’d be knocking those balls out of the park.

CC field day & banquet

In other sporting news, our CC community had its first-ever field day on 4/19. I even got into the mix, participating in a zany relay, in which I had to do a “bear walk”: move with both hands and feet touching the ground, but no knees allowed. I seriously thought I was going to die! I also did the three-legged race with my pal, Jean.

We went out to eat afterward with some of my favorite CC mamas (Adair, Christina, and Loren) and their respective broods. I just love spending time with these smart, godly, and super-fun ladies, and the boys so enjoy their cool kids, as well. Community rocks!

Zeke tosses a water-filled balloon to his pal, Brodie, while Pearce looks on. I had forgotten how fun field day is.

The CC end-of-year banquet was on 4/9. This is when the kids and their tutors recite select pieces of memory work for the audience, and all the students are awarded a certificate of completion. Mrs. Bach said Houston was “pertinacious,” while Mrs. Robinson said Zeke was “enthusiastic” and Gabriel had a “good attitude.”

Asher and Jackson tagged along with us, since I was watching the boys for the day while their folks shot a wedding here locally. I think they enjoyed seeing some of their old CC friends, and I know the 3 Amigos were thrilled to have them at the event.

Christie and Logan’s wedding ran rather late, so the whole gang spent the night and stayed well into the next day, giving us an opportunity to catch on all things political, spiritual, and otherwise. Boy did I need a J-Crew fix something fierce!

Houston & his buddy, Alex, try their best during the wheelbarrow race @ field day. You can also see Zeke (in the peach shirt) & Will (in white) on the left-hand side of the pic.

Our neighbors rock!

Jessica hosted a kids-versus-parents water-balloon battle one evening as a reward for Jacob doing well in school. (Neat idea, huh?!) I think it’s safe to say that Jacob, Nick2, Gavan, and the 3 Amigos won, but I know we geezers sure got in a few good shots on those swift and wily youngsters.

Shannon and Sam have hosted a couple backyard hangouts as of late. The get-togethers always entail a raging fire pit, roasting marshmallows, oodles of adult beverages and tobacco, and plenty of riveting conversation.

While the parents relax and chit chat, the kids can usually be found either playing freeze tag or having Nerf gun battles. It’s such a wonderful thing that both we and our boys are creating such tight bonds with the cool folks in our hood — kind of a rare thing in our increasingly mobile and impersonal world.

The 3 Amigos don Easter masks w/ their good friend, Jacob. Thanks for sharing this cute pic, Miss Jessica!

Another game the neighborhood kids have been into playing is something they call “the resources game.” The boys collect things, like leaves and flowers from around Liberty Loop; or use shovels and mallets, working to make their own goods, such as slivers of dead trees or dug-up roots.

Then they create their own individual stores, and barter and trade with one another to get the resources they want. Amazing that we have a bunch of little free-market capitalists on our hands. Rothbard would be proud!

Whole-body health

The 3 Amigos had their annual wellness visits. Zeke weighs 63.7 pounds and is 50 inches tall; Gabriel comes in at two more pounds than his twin brother (65.7 pounds!), but is the same height; and Houston is a whopping 72 pounds and is 56 inches tall, putting him in the 100th percentile of height. We’ve got some big boys indeed!

Gabriel stands beside his nice and tidy display of found goods, as he & the neighborhood boys play “the resource game.”

It was the physical challenge of field day — in addition to weighing myself and being shocked by the reading! — that has motivated me get serious about my health … again. Not so much my weight, though, but rather my strength, agility, core, and stamina.

I’ve been doing the hard-core Pyramid Workout for the past two weeks, as well as replacing my run/walk routine with running only, but for shorter distances or longer distances just at a much slower pace. The scales still aren’t being kind, but I feel pretty darn good, and that’s what really counts.

I figure as long as I keep eating well (which our family has done for years), practice portion control, limit the drinking and sweet treats, and keep on stretching after exercise, my body will be healthier.

Big Hashy Reunion: “Hey Houston … let’s be loud & obnoxious during these CC presentations. Hee hee. Wouldn’t that be funny?” inquired Asher. “Oh man, it’s so good to be back w/ my partner in crime,” thought Houston. “Epic.”

Now if I could just get my mental state consistently calm, that’d be dandy! In fact, en route to Great Wolf Lodge, something went awry. I was driving on I-85, and my periphery started to blacken, eventually closing into a single frame of tunnel vision. I got short of breath, my hands got cold and clammy, and I started to sweat.

Having reviewed all the evidence, my guess is that this was some kind of panic attack. Ugh. I know I’ve always been wound a bit tightly and certainly have the Quate temper, but the Holy Spirit has certainly helped me keep in check my sinful nature in amazing ways.

But I suppose it’s similar to addiction in that every day’s a battle. Even though I am a new creation in Christ, my flesh, baggage, and bad habits are still a part of me. In fact, they still have a way of humbling and weakening me, which is when Jesus is most powerful in my life. But really, this the submission part of the Gospel.

Nick2, Jacob, & Zeke have a blast visiting Jacob’s dad’s work. Zeke had been particularly well-behaved this day (& his brothers not so much), so he got to take part in the field trip. Thanks for the educational outing, Miss Jessica!

And oh how I need you, Lord. I also understand that other than the words that come out of my mouth (or stay in, more importantly), the things I put into my body, and the way I treat myself and others, I am not in control of anything! I must meditate daily that Jesus is the rightful Rock of my life. All else, is sinking sand.

We love Granny!

Granny loves us so much, otherwise, she’d never come to visit. She was in town in mid-April and helped me out with schooling the boys, doing “crowd control” during lessons and chores, and keeping up with housework. Truly, I put her put to work when she comes to town!

And Granny’s here right now, watching “Garfield” with the 3 Amigos. This is after having feeding them all day long, cleaning up, staying on them to get their daily basics done, and taking them to see “The Jungle Book.”

Matthew, Zeke, Tyrnan, Gabriel, Will, & Houston give three cheers for Granny! Not really … they were just prepping for field day fun, but Granny does deserve some acclamation!

We love you, too, Granny, and hope and pray you get to move closer to us in the not-too-far future. We promise to lighten up you, if you live nearby!

Other notable happenings:

  • We had Tyrnan for a full day of fun one Saturday while his folks worked. Then Jim and Penny got me back by having the twins for a sleepover. So nice!
  • We hosted Bret for a sleepover another Saturday while his parents worked. Tricia gave me a Buckhead Betties cooler and a bunch of hand-me-downs for the boys as thanks. What a sweetie!
  • We went out to a post-baseball-game dinner with Greg, Meredith, and Rorie to celebrate Stephen’s 38th birthday. Mexican food and margaritas … yum yum.
  • We went to a baptism party for Josh, the boys’ good buddy from CC and Mercy Hill. What a great joy to be part of such a blessed event.
  • I went up solo to Richmond for Christian Cozen’s funeral on 4/6. Heartbreaking event, but the family of this 20-year-old is strong in their faith, loving, and resilient. We’re praying for y’all Cozens, Bairds, and Girardis.

March madness!

Combine Memory Master crunch time, the homestretch of CC community, socializing galore, planning for a late March vacation to Florida, and dealing with day-to-day routine, obligations, and shenanigans; and then throw primary politics on top of it all, well, that is some pure madness for sure!

Gabriel & Bella show off for the camera, while Zeke, Houston, & Bret weigh down the other side of the spinny thing to ensure the fastest whirls & rotations as possible. Spur-of-the-moment park dates w/ Miss Tricia are the best!

So, CC community wraps up this coming Tuesday. Even though we zany Dillinghams school year round, this is always a huge reason to celebrate more spare time and six months of hard work under our collective belts, plus, Houston tackling Memory Master.

That child has been super-motivated achieving this academic feat (24 weeks of material for seven subjects) and, thus, has become truly proficient with the information. There were times over the course of these two semesters that I wanted to slack, but Houston always remained focused.

It has been a team effort, though. Gabriel and Zeke helped quiz Houston a ton, which, in turn, helped them with their weekly CC memory work. I think I succeeded at coming up with clever ways to review, as to keep things interesting and fresh and keeping him on target. And even Daddy got into the mix when he could.

The 3 Amigos get silly with their buddy, Josh, during Dress Like a Friend Day @ CC. We love our homeschool community!

Houston is two proofs down: one with me and the other with my pal, Adair. And then tomorrow, he does his final full proof of all 24 week’s worth of memory work (400-plus pieces of information) with his CC tutor, Mrs. Bach.

Then Houston will have his final proof with the CC director on March 31, but this test is only a quickie review of the material, aimed at illustrating that the student has true mastery of the knowledge and isn’t simply regurgitating soundbites. He’s got it made in the shade!

“Moms, don’t try to raise a good child. Raise a God-following adult.” — Lysa Terkeurst

All this studiousness is the reason why we’re treating ourselves to two fun-filled days at Great Wolf Lodge in Charlotte with some of our favorite CC families, as well as Granny. However, there was actually some doubt for a while as to whether or not we would go due to some aforementioned and intermittent misbehavior by the boys.

After a trip to Build-A-Bear, backyard silly-string battles were the perfect way to round out the festivities @ Tyrnan’s 8th birthday party.

Stephen and I went back and forth about it, until Adair finally convinced me that this parental crossroads could prove to be a valuable lesson in radical grace. “None of us deserves Great Wolf Lodge,” she said with a matter-of-fact smile.

“We all deserve Hell, and ‘our righteous acts are like filthy rags,'” she continued, calmly invoking the prophet Isaiah. “But let’s go have some fun instead!”

There is such a strength and peace to this Biblical truth, so that’s exactly what Stephen and I opted to do: give grace big because that’s what God did for us through Jesus! I’m so thankful to have incredible friends like Adair keeping me accountable to the Word while also encouraging me to lighten up when necessary. Appreciate it, sister!

While most other kids are sitting still in their school desks, the CC boys rock it out @ the park.  Homeschool homies from L to R: Zeke, Josh, Matthew, Tanner, Tyrnan, Gabriel, & Will.

I admit that I need to be a glass-half-full kinda gal more regularly, although I think I have a pretty optimistic temperament generally. Yet sometimes in the thick of it all, it’s so easy to get down. I suppose the appropriate Christian-ese diagnosis would be that I dabble in a bit of “back-sliding” every now and again.

“Backsliding, also known as falling away, is … a process by which an individual who has converted to Christianity reverts to pre-conversion habits &/or lapses or falls into sin, when a person turns from God to pursue their own desire.” — Wikipedia

Parenting is grueling but godly work, true. We are, after all, in a battle with Satan for the hearts, minds, and souls of our kids. But consistent obedience to God is ephemeral at best because of our sin nature. And woe-as-me selfishness inflicts even the most authentic and mature of Christ followers.

Still, pity parties do no one any good. So, I’m praying that I focus way more on all that is right and a lot less on the insignificant annoyances that sometimes go so overwhelmingly wrong, which I’ve dubbed “the freight train.” With Jesus as my conductor, I’m sure to get back on track.

I do believe a week of Florida sunshine just relaxing with and relishing in my peeps will also help ground me and give me perspective on this truly blessed life I lead: from those filthy rags to such unending riches of being clothed in God’s love and grace. Profoundly awesome indeed. Thank you, Lord, for so many second chances!

Here’s Aunt Lisa *literally* picking on the 3 Amigos during our quickie visit to Danville for dinner & giggles. It’s always a good thing to catch up with my big sis!

Another thing that has been lending itself to my occasional gloominess is primary politics. After all, if you’re reading this, you know for yourself how divisive, illogical, and insane this presidential campaign season has been. Sheesh.

It’s frankly appalling that so many Americans are actively trying to silence people’s right to expression simply because they disagree. Blocking traffic to rallies. Punching supporters. Attacking cops. Slandering citizens and spewing lies in the name of fighting supposed “hate speech.”

If you didn’t already realize that we live under a totalitarian system run by politically correct zealots, I guess that’s obvious now. Anti-liberty mobs are running amok, while the apparatchik media blames the violence on its victims and the desperate oligarchs gleefully foster the hate. Sick.

Just another satisfied customer: Stephen does his “civic duty” on NC primary day, but only after deciding who to vote for via impersonal Facebook survey. Luckily, Trump won out over Sanders, but just by a single vote. Whew.

I had to take a Facebook break for a while because people’s sheer ignorance of politics, history, and our republican form of government was making me want to say very un-Christian things to people I like. I mean, one shouldn’t consume mainstream campaign news for a month and then act like a political guru. That’s silliness.

And just because I love Jesus doesn’t mean that I’m willing to suspend all reality or ignore facts or check truth at the door, for goodness sake. Sometimes a calm, but persistent rabble rouser is just what the world needs.

Moreover, news junkies like me can’t be fooled by Megan Kelly or David Brooks or social-media memes or neocon henchmen or academic elites. It’s even worse when Christians who typically don’t dirty their hands with the worldliness of politics (except for gay marriage and abortion, of course) start the finger-wagging and lecturing. Ugh.

This ultra-cool neighborhood posse (clockwise from top left: Matthew, Crystal, Gavin, Nick 2, Gabriel, Zeke, Nick 1, Jacob, & Houston) has more maturity & commonsense than does most of the American electorate. Seriously.

Trump = Bad, even kinda anti-Christ. But guy who quotes the Bible in support of never-ending taxation = Just fine and dandy. Or guy who claims he wants to save unborn white and black babies here has no qualms about killing brown babies by drone and/or illegal war abroad = No problems there. For real? Just stick to the Gospel, y’all.

Puh-leez! Where were all you people when Ron Paul was running for president in 2012? You “for the sake of the party” stooges would rather support yet another socialism-lite establishment candidate than really strike at the heart of the shadow government and the leviathan that oversees its proliferation.

Paul’s platform was freedom, family, live and let live, non-interventionism, putting abortion back in the hands of the States where it should be (just like murder is not federal law), getting government out of the marriage biz altogether, and slashing regulation and auditing the fed, so that folks could have greater control over their income and savings.

CC buddy, Joel, & Houston soak in the afternoon sunshine after a hard day’s work @ homeschool community. You give me hope for the future, fellas!

And I sure won’t be bullied into voting for a turncoat big-government Republican, a warfare-worshipping chick, or an outright socialist simply by being pegged a sexist, racist, or xenophobe. Words have meanings, and just because some people throw them about willy nilly for political purposes doesn’t denote a change in definition.

Funny thing is that I’m a person who has come to think that the electoral process is a sham, so I wasn’t even going to vote, that is, till the hateful social-justice warriors and their minions in the media told me who I’d better damn well not support.

Yeah, it’s like how all the anti-smoking fanatics make me wanna buy a carton of Marlboros and blaze up. Same thing with the coercive thought-controllers and speech-police authoritarians. I hope my Trump vote triggered the hell out of them. Grrrrr.

A little blurry, but maybe that’s a good thing since the dude’s in a weenie bikini. Still, Houston, Gabe, & Matthew are psyched to hang w/ one of the wrestling heroes of the night.

Now that I got all that off my chest, let’s end on a positive note: The 3 Amigos had another piano party in February, but Gabriel and Zeke are just itching to have their first recital. Hopefully, that’ll happen in the spring for my proud piano-playing dudes.

Stephen took the boys and Matthew to AML pro wrestling for a testosterone-filled good time sans the mamas. Many punches, kicks, drops, and stomps have been attempted since then.

Houston is playing competitive baseball, with tryouts and everything. (The twins weren’t interested this year.) There haven’t been any games yet, but Stephen says his skills are advancing quickly. Plus, we’re all ready for some daggone scorekeeping and trophies for the winners only!

Gavin, Houston, & Zeke refill their “ammo” in preparation for battle w/ the enemy (Gabriel, Nick 2, & Jacob) during the first backyard water war of 2016.

My cool neighbor, Jessica, had a Sunday evening party in early March. It was a total blast! Not only did the kids get to hang with some of their best buds, but Stephen and I were able to get much better acquainted with some of our closest neighbors. That’s just the power of margaritas, wine, beer, and cigars!

Jessica and I have become fast friends, having had a couple “mom/booze dates” to celebrate the hard work of rearing dudes. All of our neighbors are cool, but the two of us have hit it off. Probably doesn’t hurt that we’re both writers, slight potty mouths, boy moms, with have twisted senses of humor.

Also, we finally had our friends Tricia and Jeremy (and their sweet kids, Bret and Bella) over to our house for a much-overdue occasion of chilling out and getting to know each other better. Interestingly, this fine night also included wine, beer, and cigars, as well as bourbon, brisket, and riveting political conversation.

Tricia and Jeremy are spiritually mature and very knowledgeable in their faith, informed citizens, open-minded debaters, and interesting individuals all around. So glad we’re growing our relationship with such fine folks as them, as well as many other wonderful people that we’re blessed to now call “friends.” Yay!

“All of God’s grace in one little face”

It’s kind of a hackneyed saying used for christening greeting cards and nursery wall decor, but I think the quote aptly encapsulates Zeke’s baptism. He truly understands the grace, love, and forgiveness that comes from being a Christ follower, so he wanted to proclaim publicly his faith in this Good News.

In the fall, Zeke stopped one of his Sunday school teachers, telling her that he wanted to get baptized — something that our church leaders didn’t think he and Gabriel were ready for when they had previously asked a year ago. Neither of them quite got the simple, but transformational power and freedom of the Gospel at that point.

Zeke takes the plunge on January 31: Pastor Jeremy talks to the congregation about how discipleship begins & ends in the home as Zeke prepares to get baptized by Daddy!

But this time, our sometimes quick-to-temper, often-comedic, and always-passionate son took it upon himself to get the baptismal ball rolling. He knew he wanted tell the world that he loves Jesus and was able to convey that it’s not through works or goodness that a person is saved. Rather, it is through Christ alone.

It’s so cool to see the Holy Spirit working in people, even small ones! And this radical grace is evident in Zeke by his growing faith, as well as his excitement, joy, and pride about taking the plunge. Thank you, God, for welcoming my sweet boy into the body of Christ! You can check out the awesome video here.

“In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” — Proverbs 3:6

Thanks too to Granny, and Gramsey and Papa for coming to town for the monumental occasion. Your presence here for the main event meant the world to Stephen and me, as well as Zeke. Y’all rock!

We’ve had our fair share of snow so far in 2016, including a minor dusting early in the year, the big “Snow-mageddon” in late January, and then another snowfall on Valentine’s Day. What all the white stuff has made me realize is that there’s a beautiful human corollary to blustery storms that I like to call “snow anarchy.”

Good friends, like Dixie, are so kind to always share their sledding equipment w/ the 3 Amigos.

But I’m referring to anarchy in the positive, voluntarism kind of way, where people help people, even breaking the laws when necessary, just doing what they have to do in a nonaggressive way just to survive the elements and/or celebrate the snow.

You know what I mean … like folks parking cars at stop signs just because that seemed like a good place to plant your icy vehicle. Or people on foot taking over a roadway just because it happens to be a good sledding hill. Or adults walking the streets with open containers of alcohol just ’cause “Hey, it’s snowing, and I don’t have to work!”

Snow brings communities together and bonds people in a way that they aren’t pushed into doing in mild weather. In fact, these latest storms have given us the opportunity to really bond with some of our newer neighbors, whom we are so fortunate to have met.

Houston & Matthew sled w/ new buddies, Jacob & Nick 2 (called that since there’s already another Nick in the neighborhood), during Snow-mageddon.

I suppose these relationships may have unfolded eventually, but nature instead propelled them in such a speedy, yet genuine way. It’s like snow is God’s means of coaxing this mad-dashed world into slowing down, relaxing with a cup of hot cocoa, sharing a cold beer, warming up in your skivvies by the fire, and being jolly!

Sometimes the snow causes otherwise smart people to turn do stupid things, though. Like when we were driving home after a Valentines dinner, cars were littering the roadsides, hazards flashing, rear bumpers poking out of ditches. There were even some folks stopped in the middle of the street.

Of course, I took advantage of the lawlessness, waiting as patiently as possible on a bridge at the bottom of an icy hill till just enough room opened up on the steep slope ahead. When we saw a small clearing among the chaos, I went for it, building my momentum steadily.

The 3 Amigos enjoy an afternoon of hardcore Nerf gun battles w/ old & new pals, Nick 1, Gavin, Matthew & Jacob, while Mommy burns yard trimmings in the nearby fire ring. Ah, the freedom of childhood is indeed a blissful thing.

We cruised on through anxiously but successfully, passing a slew of cars, including stuck trucks and SUVs. We trekked on along the darkened, icy, nearly abandoned roads. By the time we arrived at the grocery store near our house, our adrenaline levels were sky high. It was a tad stressful, but more an incredible adventure really!

We’ve been increasing our pool of friends these days … not just the boys, who have made buddies with our new neighbors, Nick 2 and Jacob, but also Stephen and I, who have bonded with their cool parents, Shannon and Sam, and Geoff and Jessica respectively.

We’ve also had some success in growing our relationships with some of our no-so-new friends. For instance:

  • We finally getting together with my pal, Pam, who I met in my recovery class years ago, and her daughter, Jess. Sure the impetus for hanging out was that she lent us a keyboard for our CC family presentation. But we made a fun afternoon out of it, and then caught Kung Fu Panda 3 with them a few weeks later to return the instrument.

It’s a bit fuzzy, but still the best pic of Stephen & me hanging out w/ our good pals, Jim & Penny … salt-of-the-earth peeps for sure!

  • Our CC/Mercy Hill pals, Jim and Penny, invited the clan to dinner at their house. Their kid, Tyrnan, is tight with the 3 Amigos, and Stephen and I have a lot of beliefs, opinions, and even politics in common with his parents. So, it was an evening of good eats and riveting conversation.
  • Jim, Penny, and Tyrnan also went out to dinner with the extended family after Zeke’s baptism. It was so nice of them to help celebrate Zeke’s big day!
  • My cool neighbor, Stacey, had us over for a small Super Bowl party. Per my request, Stacey also invited Jessica, whose husband was actually at the game in San Fran, so she and Jacob were missing him/jealous. Even though the Panthers lost, it was a wonderful time of getting to know these fine ladies better.
  • My CC pal, Adair, invited the boys and I to her house today, so her son, Will, and Houston could work on Memory Master. She’s such a neat, authentic person, so I always thoroughly enjoy my time with her. The dudes really get along with her entire brood, which also includes daughter Daiah, and sons Wright and Pearce.
  • I got to spend a little chit-chat time with Tricia and Jeremy when I picked up Houston after Bret’s birthday sleepover. Eventually, we will have some quality time with these ultra-cool folks, who also share many of our beliefs and principles. Who knew there were so many libertarian-leaning Christians out there?!

The 3 Amigos & Tyrnan exhibit their NY pizza high after Zeke’s post-baptism dinner celebration. What goofballs!

Speaking of Bret’s birthday, Houston was invited to the sleepover, and the twins got jealous. We explained to them that Bret is 11, and even though he truly likes both Gabriel and Zeke, he just chooses to hang with older boys sometimes, especially when he’s limited to a three-friend party.

I understand that it bums them out. And I know that it stings even more ’cause Bret was one of the two friends that Gabriel and Zeke invited to their birthday sleepover.

But I think another part of it is that Houston is particularly mature, and Gabe and Zeke … well, not so much, at least not on a consistent basis. Truly, they have the ability to be way more mature than they often choose to be.

I see it all the time, one or both of them behaving like such big boys, exhibiting great self-control, and being cool in the face of adversity. Then — poof! — it’s gone, and they’re back to the old ways, whining, screeching, disrespecting Mommy and Daddy, and even having a not-as-rare-as-it-should-be tantrum. Sigh.

Although the Panthers lost the big game, we ladies (L to R: Jessica, Michelle, Stacey, & yours truly) & our six wild boys sure had a blast @ the Super Bowl party!

I can’t say that I blame any boy who chooses to play with a more even-temper kid over a more spastic, prone-to-meltdown one. Makes perfect sense to me.

So, Stephen and I are simply trying to instill this truth in los gemelos without damaging their fragile little egos. I think they’re slowly, but surely catching on that even at 7 years old, a boy cannot cry about everything. The phrase “man up” exists for a reason, even if it is politically incorrect in our zany post-modern world.

Now, let me take this opportunity to say that, yes, of course Houston is sometimes the culprit, dishing a bad ‘tude, going wild physically, or (the worst case scenario) picking relentlessly on his bros. But his dalliances with misdeeds are pretty sparse these days, with the exception of the latter. But even that has shown improvement.

Granny helps Houston bake brownies for a math lesson (measurements & all that), which helps me w/ school, & then helps the lot of us stuff our faces w/ chocolate goodness. Thanks for paying it forward, Granny!

I must emphasize that we do empathize and certainly don’t expect perfection. After all, everyone has a meltdown every now and again. I tell all the boys that the aim really is to use the Fruits of the Holy Spirit to make our misconduct as infrequent a thing possible, while using that God-given strength to handle trials in a much calmer manner.

“Obedience to God leads to blessing; disobedience leads to burden.” — Max Lucado

Ain’t that quote the truth?! Poor Zeke broke an XBox controller in a fit of anger last month, and had to buy a replacement, which ran the kid $50! And then Gabriel broke the kids’ nice headphones (among a few other cheaper items) due to over-the-top hyperactivity and carelessness, and then had shell out $20 for a new pair!

Truly, time is the biggest casualty of all the misbehavior. It affects our school day dramatically, which in turn limits our opportunities to do anything else, whether it be me exercising, the boys hanging with friends, extracurricular outings, playdates, housework, chilling out at home … you name it!

Gabriel & Zeke are hard @ work during an art lesson @ CC. They are SUCH big boys when they want to be … what a heart-warming & satisfying thing to behold.

It was this scarce resource of time that pushed me into saying no to tutoring Challenge B at CC next year. A lot of the mamas were urging me to take the job because this 8th-grade-level class focuses on current events, rhetoric, and logic, which they think happen to be some of my strong suits. Neat, huh?!

“Why, I feel all thin, sort of stretched, if you know what I mean: like butter that has been scraped over too much bread. That can’t be right. I need a change, or something.” — Bilbo Baggins, “Lord of the Rings”

Alas, it was not in the cards at this juncture. Sure, we’ve made progress with our time management over the years, but truly not enough to where I feel I could honestly devote ample time to my B students, my kids, my husband, and my household duties all while maintaining a semblance of peace in my life.

Or maybe drumming is another key to having attaining more self-control. Hmmmmm.

So, here’s to my kids learning to control themselves more consistently, not me trying to control them. I know we have extremely blessed lives, that cannot be denied, but this simple yet seemingly overwhelming step could lead to even more fulfillment and joy, as well as a saner, simpler, less tiring home.

“Making the best use of the time because the days are evil.” — Ephesians 5:16, ESV

I’ll keep giving my best effort at my own self-control, too, like offering grace, listening, encouraging, and leading by example even when I want to blow my top — an imperfect but godly undertaking for sure. And Lord willing, I’ll have some refinements and betterments to report on in the next blog. Let’s get to it, fellas!